It is important to utilize community resources for speakers from such agencies as Parents Anon, family help centers, women's shelters, children's crisis centers, mediators, counselors, family lawyers and Planned Parenthood. When dealing with topics such as family relations.

Carol Painter
Workshop Winners
Educational Media Corp.
P.O. Box 21311
Minneapolis, Minn. 55421
Tel: 612-781-0088

Refer to: 
pages 149-162 for "Kids Like Us" family sculpture
pages 109-114 for "Adopt a Child" simulation
pages 85-86 for stereotypes between the sexes exercise

 Project H.A.R.T.
Healthy Alternatives for Relationships among Teens Progressive Youth Center
8630 Olive Boulevard 
St. Louis, MO 63132
Tel: 314-993-3566

Northland Family 
Help Center
2501 N. 4th St., Ste.#18

Flagstaff, AZ 86004

Tel: 520-774-4503 x.17

Fax: 520-774-5809

(An Arizona resource with great programs for domestic violence and rape prevention. Write for information and ask for materials from their

Rape Prevention and 

Education Program)

Creative Response to Conflict, Inc.
611 W. College
Silver City, NM 88061
NYC: 914-353-1796
Edna C. Adler, Director
(Inquire about workshops on sexual harassment)

Family and Teen Help Links:

Whole Family Center

 Teens Only!
(Lots of Great Links)

Over the years there have been many videos broadcast over the "Classroom Channel" dealing with relationships. Check with your school librarian or with the Classroom channel for a list of available titles. Such resources are found in the Dewy Decimal range of 300-380. For example:

A Little Problem at Home 
(focus: problems of growing up in a dysfunctional family)
More Information:
University of Wisconsin at Green Bay, 1110 IS Bldg. University of Wisconsin, Green Bay, WI 54311
Tel: 414-465-2599

Power Surge
(focus: interviews with teens about parents and divorce)
DD#362 More information:
Media International, 313 E. Broadway, Suite 202, Glendale, CA 91209
Tel: 800-477-7575
Student Voices
(focus: drugs, family)
Sexual Harassment
(focus: understanding what it is and why it hurts)
Source: Altschul Group

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Chapter VII: Friendship, Love, Marriage, and Sex
(pages 121-142)

To understand the fundamentals of positive relationships and to understand and avoid the pitfalls of unsuccessful or dysfunctional relationships.

The following topics and activities should be used to in conjunction with the text to discuss all types of relationships. Utilize guest speakers and a variety of videos to develop discussions.  Have students pull out key phrase as they read the text pages 121-142 and record them in their leadership notebook. Discuss these phrases in conjunction with the topics below. In each topic have the class come up with guidelines for good relationships and post these in class on large sheets of butcher paper.


Part I: Have students do a friendship inventory as follows:

  • list the qualities they want to have in a friend
  • list what they want out of a friendship
  • list what personal qualities they have to give to a friendship
  • list the types of behavior that hurt a friendship
  • state if they have a best friend and describe the relationship
  • draw a symbol for the ideal friendship and find one or two words to describe it
  • discuss and share their inventory in small groups
Part II: Activity: "How to be your own best friend"
Students answer the following questions in writing.
  • How can my body be my best friend and how can I be the best friend of my body?
  • How can my emotions be my best friend and how can I be the best friend of my emotions?
  • How can my mind be my best friend and how can I be the best friend of my mind?
  • Do I have a "best friend" inside of me? How do I know?
  • What behavior might I change in order to be the best friend of my body, emotions, and mind?
  • Do I find it easy or hard to forgive myself when I hurt myself in some way?
  • How is my self image related to being a friend to myself? Which aspects of my self image, goals and desires are my friend and which are not?
  • What does it mean to be one's own best friend?

Purpose: To reflect upon how we learn about relationships--good and bad. Our own family is the foundation of what we know about gender roles and relationships. Have students do the following steps individually in their notebooks and in groups. (For examples of some of these activities you may refer to Carol Painter's book, Workshop Winners):

  1. Define "family" 
  2. List various types of families 
  3. Do a simulation in small groups of a nuclear family making the decision to adopt a child. Each group lists the considerations in the adoption process. Decide on age, gender, race/origin, and other conditions of adopted child. Choose a name for the adopted child. State what their "family" can and must provide for the adopted child in order to qualify as the adoptive family. 
  4. Think, Ink, Pop-up: "Family Portrait" Each student draws stick figures to represent their family doing something typical or defining as a family. Students "pop-up" to share their portraits and explain how it describes their family relationships. 
  5. Independence: How we move out of the family. Discuss when and why people move out of the family and live on their own. What skills must a person develop for living on his or her own? What responsibilities of families are now assumed by the child who moves out of the family? Positive and negative reasons for moving out.
  6. What can one do when things go wrong in a family? Who can help when there is domestic violence, child abuse, or neglect?
  7. What are the responsibilities of parents? What are the unique responsibilities of mothers and fathers? Make a list by brainstorming in small groups first then as a whole class.
Invite guest speakers from community agencies to talk about the types of behavior which characterize the dynamics of  healthy and unhealthy families.

Show videos which deal with some of the problems and solutions in family relations.

Choosing your partner: Understanding the opposite sex

The following topics may be dealt with in both their positive and negative aspects in conjunction with this chapter using class discussion, guest speakers, and videos:

  • Project (individual or group): What men believe about women and what women believe about men. Where do we form our beliefs and opinions? Include influence of magazines and movies. List common myths about the opposite sex and what the facts are. Is it right to generalize about the opposite sex? Analyze how gender myths are perpetuated through a visual product such as a collage of articles and advertisements in magazines, or through a written project and/or oral presentation which analyze gender roles as portrayed on television sitcoms, advertising, or talk shows.
  • Notebook Entry: What qualities should we look for in a partner?  Use "Think, Ink, Pop-up" technique.
  • Dating/Partner relationships including the problems of date rape, expectations of behavior, abusive relations, STDs, etc.
  • Sexual identity including how we learn about how to behave via family, role models, expectations, stereotypes, media, self-acceptance (eating disorders), gender influence on goal-setting, the challenges of the single parent, etc.
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Stories and tales of sacrifice.

Reader's Digest
Section entitled, 
Heroes for Today

CBS Sunday Morning
with Charles Osgood
9:00 AM ET/PT
(check local listings)
A great program for inspirational stories of average citizens doing things to improve life.

*Outstanding Video

Homeless to Harvard
ABC News Videos
(item # T991217 02 1 A FL-6)


You've Gotta Have Heart


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Chapter VIII: What is the Role of Sacrifice 
in Our Life?

 (pages 143-163)

To define sacrifice and discover the different types of sacrifice one can make as a positive contribution to oneself and to others. To enable students to identify and appreciate the sacrifices that many people make everyday in the course of living their life.

What are the characteristics of a hero?(pre-reading activities for pages 143-152) 

  • Read a well-known tale such as Snow White, Beauty and the Beast, Cinderella, or a folk tale from any culture. List the types of sacrifices the hero/heroine made and his or her attitude towards them.
  • Read accounts of real-life heroes from Reader's Digest or other source. List the types of sacrifices the hero/heroine made and his or her attitude towards them.
  • Compare the fictional with the real hero. Is there some common ground which they share in relationship to their sacrifice and attitude?
  • Analyze the motivations of the heroes. Were they selfish or unselfish.
  • State how reader feels after reading such stories. Is there a difference between the feelings resulting from fictional versus non-fictional accounts? Discuss.
  • Have class come up with some basic characteristics of acts of sacrifice.
  • Have students share/discuss people they have known in their lives who have such characteristics. What are examples of the sacrificial things they do?
What kinds of sacrifice are there? (pre-reading activities for pages 152-163) 
  • Describe the types of sacrifice one can make: physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, financially, time. 
  • What are practical, real-life examples of these kinds of sacrifice and what are the the effects of each on both the doer and the receiver? 
"Personal Experiences of Sacrifice" (questions for discussion or written expression): 
  • Have you ever met anyone who you consider a hero? What did they do to qualify?
  • Think about and write down those forces preventing the expression of sacrifice. (see page 147, paragraph 2)
  • How have you ever experienced "love in action?" What "gifts" have you received that demonstrate this? (see page 148, bottom)
  • Come up with a new term for the concept of "sacrifice." Find or create music, art, or a symbol which expresses this definition.
  • Recount experiences of giving where you gave and felt gain instead of loss. What was gained?
  • Identify people and/or things in nature and society which perform acts of sacrifice as part of their normal behavior.
  • What is the difference between "duty," "responsibility," and "sacrifice?" What is the different viewpoint of each type of act of service?
  • What would you like to express to others, and what type of a "sacrifice" would that involve?

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Les Brown, 
Live Your Dreams
ISBN 0-688-11889-5

Five  Live your Dreams
      Developing Goals
Six   Fix Your Focus
      Using Goals to Direct Your Life

Worksheets pages 248-256

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Chapter IX: How to Prepare for the Future
 (pages 165-178)

To assist students to understand the importance of setting goals and to have students develop and evaluate goals in order to prepare for the future.

Activities and Questions for Goal-Setting and Planning for the Future:

  • Write a brief narrative about how you expect your life will be in seven years (At this point revisit the introduction pages 14-17 starting with the quote: "Imagine trying to put together a puzzle with no idea of the picture you are trying to make." Relate the following exercise to trying to imagine the big picture of one's life. Emphasize that sometimes the picture will change but at least it helps to get some concept of one's goals):
    • What year will it be?
    • How old will you be?
    • Where will you live?
    • What will you be doing?
    • With whom will you be living?
    • What will be the biggest difference of your lifestyle from the present?
    • What will be the world situation? (political, social, environmental, technological)
  • List three goals that are important to you today. What do you need to do to achieve them?
  • How have you challenged yourself in the past? What changes have you created in your life?
  • Do you have any plans for future challenges for yourself?
  • How can you be of service for others now and in the future?

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